He'll love me 50

They say its in his kiss
But what if he's just a good kisser

If i'm his lady
Why is he not my man

He says he wants my all
But he can't give me all of him

Is that just the way it is....... i don't think so
I'm not having that.

How can I love someone fully
Who's telling me he can only love me 50

He's keeping it 100, but his 100 is my 50.

I can't do it,
I'm feeling exposed, so vulnerable and open and still
only 50 is what he'll give me..... why does he want 100 from me
when he will only give me 50

It's not fair,
well lifes not fair is what he tells me -
WRONG,

my life is fair he doesn't see me,
why would i Choose to love a man who will only love me 50.
why is it a problem for him that I wont love him and his 50.
How cant he understand that 100 needs 100
50 wont do me.

When i give, i give my all
your spirituality is not enough for me i need your humanity,
when he's not with me he's with me in spirit
really - realllllly.
Maybe now and then but always - no!

I need you with me physically
i need to feel you inside of me
outside of me
right next to me
you feel me ?

I need that emotional connection
how can i connect emotionally
with a man who's telling me he can only love me 50

I need that intellectual connection
How can we be connected intellectually
with only half an understanding that 50 doesn't match 100

I need that energetic connection
all chakras in alignment
energy flowing through all centres
Breath to breath, heart to heart, eye to eye, belly to belly, toe to toe and yes loin to loin
you with me ?

Mr 50, he's not you
you say your 50 is another mans 150
just so long as you don't count time and effort....
what does that even mean. how can you not.

Mr 50,
you want to be the man for me
yet you want me to change my needs from a man who i'll call my man?

no. I want it all.
Spiritual you got but i want it all
spiritual, emotional, intellectual,energetic and yes, physical.
the 5 key connections for me

So i'm still looking
still waiting
coz i know he's out there

I wanna know what real love looks like and i know its not going to be found in your eyes.
I wanna know what love is and i know its not me giving up what i want from the one.
I wanna say those vows that you are to spiritual to say..... so you say.
I know when i see him i'll know him
he'll show me what love is.

He'll find me.
when we're ready
we'll know we.

we'll say our vows to each other
under the trees in our favourite woods
swap stones in front of those we love and we'll love each other and all that is together

we'll make beautiful babies, oozing love
with eyes so bright it'll blind the darkest light till only brightness flows through the cracks of fear
they'll be no darkness from these eyes....

a true reflection of what real love creates.

50. you're not the one for me.
50. you dont see me
50.... you wont feel me.

Tara Ismail